Men and Church

A few days ago I received an an article from a friend regarding men and the church. Essentially a review of David Murrow's Why Men Hate Going to Church, this article reactivated my thinking on this topic. Murrow found that the top reasons why men don't like church are:

1. Men don't like to sing in public.
   Think about how much of our worship involves singing. Look around at your next worship service and notice how many men are participating but not singing.


2. Men don't really like to talk about their feelings or to talk about relationships.
   Think about how your church talks about following Jesus. Most of us use the picture of a relationship with Jesus. We tell men that they grow in that relationship by sitting around and talking about how the Bible impacts their life.


3. Most men love a challenge, a chance to risk and to put their faith into action.
   Consider having more opportunities for the men in your church to grow through service. I had a real learning experience when twelve men from our congregation spent a week in New Orleans after hurricane Katrina. We did not spend a ton of time in the Bible each day, but instead put faith into action, shoulder to shoulder, as we "mucked out" houses, shingled roofs and ate and played together. I bet those twelve men would say they grew more in their faith that week than at any other time in their lives.


4. Men respect and expect excellence and quality.
   But excellence and quality are probably not the first two words that pop into the average man's mind when he thinks about church. Think seriously about how your church can strive for excellence and quality in all the areas of your ministry; from the music to the messages; from the way the church is decorated to the activities you offer men. God is worthy of our best efforts and so are the men (and women) who have yet to come to know His grace in Jesus.

Personally this list really speaks to my heart (well, 2-4 anyway--I do love singing). It's really no wonder our men are passive our absent--we've designed the church to exclude and suppress much of what is masculine. We don't let men be men and we suffer for it.

In our simple expression of Christ's body we've been examining Jesus and one thing that's been brought to our attention is how he's constantly on the move. He's active. He's working. Sure, the conversations and relationship are there, but those things are developing while Jesus is taking his band of followers all over the place--i.e. eating and healing, proclaiming the nearness of the kingdom of the heavens, righting wrongs, and living out righteousness and shalom in his every moment. Jesus hardly spent most of his time in a sterile environment sitting around in a circle discussing how loving God is. He was out demonstrating how loving God is.

We still sit around and have discussions--and rightfully so--but we also encourage people to get out there and dispense some shalom to the people around you. Whether that is sitting at a bar watching the Red Sox and talking with the people there (like Jen and I are doing tonight), or walking your puppy and taking advantage of the opportunities that creates (like the Plotts are doing), or helping out at a homeless food shelter (Adam and I on Wednesday) it's important to get out there.

Men of the church, what are your thoughts?

Here's a website discussing these issues.